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Monday, August 16, 2004
Spotlight On...

The outspoken, the outrageous, the  outstanding...
Green Tuna.

Name:  Victoria Walker
Age:    42
Location:  At my desk
Where were you born?  Detroit, Michigan
If you could live anywhere in the universe, where would it be?
This is hard!  I would want to live in Hatteras, NC for the beach and the ocean -- Sandusky Ohio for Cedar Point -- Washington DC for the Smithsonian Museums -- Munich for Oktoberfest -- Amsterdam for the Heinicken Beer Museum and the Reijksmuseum being within stumbling distance of each other -- And in my own backyard, for the chance to watch the flowers and eat the tomatoes, blueberries, raspberries, boysenberries and grapes before TinyTuna gets home.
What did you want to be when you grew up?  In third grade I remember saying I wanted to be "famous" when I grew up, and I got hazed something fierce for that.  So, in order not to relive that psychological trauma again, I'll change my answer and say, "Really, REALLY famous."
Would you be more likely to be famous from your writing, or from your singing talents?
It better be Singing.  I didn't endure years and years of lessons from deranged sopranos for nothing!
What were mealtimes like for you as a child?  Depends.  No -- we weren't WEARING Depends, although sometimes I think it would have helped.  "Regular" meals were in the kitchen.  With four kids we had individual stools and eating places built in around the kitchen cabinetry so we wouldn't kick the hell out of each other and start the usual "STOP TOUCHING ME" arguments.  For more special occasions we ate together at the dining room table, but more often than not, someone would start laughing about something unfunny, causing all of us to start laughing about something unfunny, causing my dad to threaten banishment to the bedroom.  Which made us laugh harder.
Do you get your sense of humor from GramTuna?
I think I get my humor from a sense of self-preservation.  When you have to compete with three other siblings, two adults, a dog, two cats, fish, mice, guinea pigs, hamsters, fiddler crabs and yes, an ALLIGATOR, it's survival of the fittest, baby!  Actually, everybody in my family is wickedly funny, GramTuna included.  In fact, this weekend all of us kids are in town and tonight we are having the DREADED family picture taken.  I pity the fool who will be the photographer and has to deal with all of us at one time.
I do have to add that I was reminded by my mother and her sister that my grandfather, (maternal), was quite the writer. He was a career Navy man, and during those long months and sometimes years that he was gone, he would send letters home.  They were called "The Pink Sheets" because his last name was Pinkerton.  I don't remember reading these, but my Grandfather had an absolutely wicked sense of humor.  Someday I hope to find some of these writings -- it would probably be a very "Circle of Life" kind of moment.
What family talents does Tiny Tuna seem to have?
If you asked her, you'd be sitting here all day.  She would tell you she is an excellent singer, dancer, ice skater, writer, actress and cook -- to name just a few.  She has the parental singing genes down pat -- we all have a music background -- but Ice Skating?  No.  Not unless being a Human Zamboni is a talent.  Oh and yeah, she does have that Drama thing down to a freaking science.
Did you ever like any of your school photos?  I have a couple of classics, that's for sure.  In second grade I got in a fight with a girl at the bus stop, so my School Picture hair is all messed up.  In fourth-grade I channeled Snow White and looked absolutely angelic.  I think my true persona lies somewhere in the middle.
What was your first date like?  It must not have been anything special, because I have absolutely no recollection, Senator.
Ever have any celebrity crushes?
No.  Aren't I boring?
What is in your vegetable bin?  I have been preparing for this question all summer.  I have ceased placing actual produce in my vegetable bins, because I forget they are there until Eau de Compost wafts from the bottom of my Frigidaire.  Now, my bins hold juice boxes for TinyTuna (on the left) and Mike's HardLemonade for Mom (on the right).  Lest you think I'm anti-vegetable, my refrigerator is usually full of tomatoes (yes, I know they are a fruit), mushrooms, broccoli, cauliflower, asparagus, squash, and anything else in season.

Except avocado, right?
Avocado is neither a fruit nor a vegetable.  Avocado is a nasty.  Ditto for rhubarb, if you were gonna ask.
What color is your car?  Bright Red with small rusty accents.  Technically Two-Toned Bright Red with small rusty accents.  Rusty accents are my version of "spoilers"
Tell us about your new bunny!
The Fabster!  Fabio the Fahhbulous!  Fabio is quite the Bun.  He is a white-haired french angora, which means he has very, very long luscious hair everywhere but on his face.  We got him last February at the Bunny show and technically it is TinyTuna's pet.  (HEE!)  He wasn't a good "show" bunny because he has a microscopic white freckle on his black nose.  He was very gentle, and we decided to adopt him.  He gives "kisses" in the morning (licks like a dog) and loves carrots, bananas, papaya, pineapple, and of course...DANDELIONS!  His parents were "Samson" and "Lady Godiva" so we felt we needed to give him a "beautiful hair" name.  Someday, if we ever had a tan female, we'd name her "Farrah".
Are you having a good hair day today? HA!  You forget that I work in a library, where we take an occuptational oath to have the worse hair immaginable.  So no, I'm not having a good hair day.  I'm having a late-summer, gotta-shift-so-why-get-dressed-up hair day.  Dusty books don't care how you look.
What's your favorite perfume.   Fresh Baked Bread.
Subtle, yet yeasty. 
What is the last thing that made you laugh out loud?
A joke I heard about swimming :)
That was a good one!
What is your middle name.  Kay.  Don't ask, I dunno.
What types of books do you like to read? I tend toward essays (because they are short and to the point), non fiction, history, and award-winning fiction and short stories.  I also have a strong affinity for children's picture books, and kiddie lit in general.
What do you read online?
Ay-Carumba!  Too many, or not enough, depending on how you look at my bloglines list.  I really do a mix of political (AMERICAblog, Wonkette), regional (Ocracoke Journal, Gothamist, LAist), Photography (APOD, among many others), Library (You don't really care about these, do you?) Humor (Surrounded by Nincompoops, Spamusement, Dan Wheeler), as well as every single journal posted up on HT.  I am constantly fascinated by what people have to say.
What is your favorite type of cookie?  There have to be three:  1. Oatmeal raisin.  2.  The hardest Ginger Snap the store will sell 3.  My homemade Persimmon cookies.
Who would you like to see featured on our next Spotlight?  As I am answering this questionnaire on Friday the 13th...I think it only appropriate that we pounce on  "The 13th Thing" -- *snap*snap* -- Our fellow writer, SNAPPIE!

Thanks Tuna, for being so much fun to interview and to hang out with!

Posted at 01:30 am by ChefGrace
(3) Shout Outs  

Sunday, August 15, 2004
Good Ideas Gone Bad

buffyvol1:  Hey Grace, I made up a new recipe tonight for dinner
chefgracegeorge:  oh, share, buff!
buffyvol1:  It's called Taco Tators and they were CRAP!
berfer2:  hee, taco taters
Copssister:  Taco Taters does NOT sound good
buffyvol1:  I roasted cut up tators with olive oil and taco seasoning and they were AWFUL!
berfer2:  it doesn't sound bad in theory...
buffyvol1:  I don't recommend them at all
Copssister:  how many taters did you make, Buffy?
buffyvol1:  I cut up 8 figuring the boys would love them
buffyvol1:  and then have some for tomorrow
buffyvol1:  well, I have some for tomorrow
buffyvol1:  and the next day
Copssister:  and the next day
Copssister:  and the next day
buffyvol1:  and the next day
Copssister:  heeeeee
Copssister:  Buffy should have a FoodTV show...."good ideas gone bad"

Posted at 08:14 pm by ChefGrace
(3) Shout Outs  

School Daze

My daughter started kindergarten this past week!
Thursday was her first official day at school.  The
kids only had to go to school for an hour, to learn
where their classroom is, meet the teacher, and
to get familiar with the bus ride home.

I didn't realize that Alex would be taking the bus
until the night before.  The teacher had called me
said that she encouraged all of the children
to take
the bus home the first day, so I braced
to share the news with my daughter. 
She took it very well, however, and didn't seem
scared at all. So, I dropped her off at school that
morning, and
although I said I wouldn't, I got
teary-eyed when
I drove away, seeing her
stand there looking a so
big, yet so little
compared to her backpack.

When it was time for her to return home, I took
Jacob out to the sidewalk with me, and soon he
began jumping up and down when the bus came
into sight.  The bus approached us, and slowed
down, just as I broke into a big smile.  The bus
passed us, and I began to look puzzled.  The
bus kept going, without stopping, and I began to
panic. Jacob began to cry. I ran inside and
called the school.  The said they would try to
contact the bus driver and have her come back
around.  Ten very scary minutes later, the bus
came back, stopped, and let my daughter off,
into my grateful arms.  I could tell that she'd been
crying, and when I hugged her, she broke down
again, saying that she'd gotten lost.  I assured
her that the bus driver had just made an error
that day and that it would never happen again.

After a few moments of soothing her, she gave
me some paperwork, then looked in her backpack
for Valerie.  Valerie is a bear that Alex is very
attached to, and because she had to ride the bus
home, I allowed her to carry Valerie in her backpack
just for that day.  But, Valerie wasn't there.  The
backpack was empty, and Alex began to cry again.

I had to call the school again, and explain the situation.
I was made to talk to the principal, and was reprimanded
for allowing my daughter to take something personal to
school.  The prinicpal said that she would do her best
to locate Valerie and return her to Alex at school.

I felt bad that Alex's first day of school had to be so
hard on her, but I was very proud of her the next day,
when she marched up to the school, looking like she
belonged there, and stepping off the bus that afternoon
with a big smile and Valerie.

I think she's off to a good start now.

Posted at 05:30 pm by ChefGrace
(4) Shout Outs  

Saturday, August 14, 2004
Chat Much?

I was up until the wee hours of the morning chatting with friends last night.  To Buffy, (who left because she had to scrape the Taco Tater pan), and to Green Tuna, (because she'd already had enough fun for one night),and to several others of you who wussed out early, I must say that you missed a very lively evening. 

To my friends from last night's chat, I must thank you for the most memorable Friday night I've had since the one I spent at Overg's house.

[Raises Bloody Mary]

Posted at 12:45 pm by ChefGrace
(3) Shout Outs  

Thursday, August 12, 2004
Spotlight On.... ME!

Overg turned the tables on me for this week's spotlight!

The above picture of Grace and Overg was taken
on the 4th of July by Green Tuna,
who's interview you can see here next week!

Grace George


Indianapolis, IN

Name the members of your household (including pets) from tallest to shortest. Myself, Alexandra (daughter), Jacob (son), Sally (cat), Bee (cat), Alex III, (fish)

Where were you born?
About 5 miles from here

*Builds shrine in Indianapolis*

What did you want to be when you grew up?
I wanted to own my own greenhouse.

Rumor has it you know a thing or two about plants and flowers, and may even have a couple in your yard. . .  Yes, I have a couple...hundred flowers in my front yard alone.  Before I started talking to you every waking minute, I used to spend a lot of time out there. 

What were mealtimes like for you as a child?
We sat down for every meal, we prayed, we ate a big ole meat and potatoes dinner then dessert. We had to be asked to be excused when we were done. Then we had to do the dishes.

Did you ever do any of the cooking? Yes, a lot of it once I was able to reach the stove. 

Did you ever like any of your school photos?
Some were good, some were bad. Does the word "re-take" ring a bell?

I hear there may be some reunion photos coming our way soon.  When can we look forward to seeing you put your classmates to shame?  I did get a few pics back, but they're all blurry pictures of drunk people. Plus I'm having issues with the computer that my scanner is connected to. So, perhaps never.

What was your first date like?
I can't even remember my last date


Did you ever really find out what sex is like?
No, wait, that was your follow up question to me.

What is in your vegetable bin?
 [goes to look]
salad-in-a-bag, something I can't identify, and a bag of cedar shavings

Now, we originally started this interview almost two months ago.  Please tell me all of those things aren't still there.  [goes to look again]  Now there are two things I can't identify and a bag of cedar shavings.

What color is your car? I don't have a car, but my van is gold

Are you having a good hair day?
My hair is still wet, so it's too soon to tell
although given that it's 100% humid, chances are slim.

What is your favorite cologne?
Whatever Overg is wearing.

*runs out to buy some of that*
right now, I believe that would be "fresh cut grass"


And your favorite movie? "Arthur".  Would you like to see it with me sometime?

Only if I provide the vcr. 

What is your middle name? Eileen.

Nothing that starts with a "G"?  I wish!  Then my initials would be "GGGG", baby!

What type of books do you like to read?
History, biographies, and Women Who Love Too Much.

What is your favorite type of cookie?
Chocolate chip. I mean, really~ is there any other kind?

You've gone the whole time and only once mentioned me. There might be someone, somewhere, that doesn't know you find me dreamy. And with a great ass!
They better not find you, or I'll have to get all screechy!

Are you the jealous type?  Only when it comes to handsome, rouge drifters.

Awwww, thanks.  And thank you for all of your readers, who I know have been dying to put the spotlight on you ever since you started this series.    OOXX

Posted at 11:12 am by ChefGrace
(4) Shout Outs  

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